Fanks

I like how the British, at least some of them, replace Th's with F's. I think "Fanks" sounds nicer than "Thanks." Fanks is the informal version of thanks. Teeth sounds so much better as teef. I wonder if they called Margaret Thatcher, Madge Fatcher. It's cool; I like it. The Beatles had that Cockney-speak down perfectly. In my young life, nobody was cooler than the Beatles. They were exotic and down-to-earth at the same time. Nice combo, in my humble opinion. Fanks, Beatles.

It also brings to mind how some of the Spanish-speaking world speaks with a lisp. Barthelona, anyone? The urban legend about this Castilian lisp is that one of the Kings had a lisp and therefore everyone began to pronounce words in the same way. I believe that story has been discredited, but I'm still fond of the notion. A whole language taking shape because of one man's speech impediment. It's kind of romantic.

Even though America has become as homogenized as milk, we still hold on to our regional eccentricities in terms of language. New Englanders have their "ayuh," and "it's down the rud." Translation: Yes, it's down the road. Some New Englanders are "Wicked Cool." That's a Maine thing. New Yorkers have too many to name, but "fogeddaboudit" is a good example.

Out here in the Mid-West, soda is called pop. They don't shovel the driveway, they scoop it . . . and end many sentences with the very general and quite nice "you bet!"

Jerseyans go "down the shore." Other people just go to the beach.

Yes, people, every town in America now has a Home Depot and a Walmart. We buy all the same things at the same big box stores. Any strip mall in America could swap places with any other and it would be about the same. Dry cleaners, Chinese restaurant, Weight Watchers, Subway and maybe Triple AAA. I don't know, fill in your own strip mall. These things are everywhere.

I lament the loss of authenticity in America. Those places that can only be experienced in the flesh and in that place, although I do find some comfort in seeing familiar things in unfamiliar places--even if it is Target or CVS. However, as the world shrinks and America changes from the land of the free to the land of the cookie cutter, I like to note the differences that still remain. Food is still somewhat okay, if you get past all the chain restaurants. Still, the best restaurant we have found in Sioux City, Iowa, is Vietnamese, so go figure.

Ah, but beautifully, language endures. Art endures. Music endures. The human spirit endures. These things, by their very nature, will not be homogenized and smoothed out and made palatable to a bland diet. So I love to hear my mid-western neighbors call soda by its midwestern name: pop. They can call donuts rolls, if they like. I like it.

Oh, and fanks for reading. Cheers to you all.