My Dad used to say that "Making plans is a waste of time." Dad was the kind of guy who would make up his mind and just do it. Plans weren't part of the equation. "They never work out, in my experience," he would say. He would make decisions based on conditions, decisively and without fussing. "Okay, lets do it," and up and out he would go. I can hear him saying these words still. Whether it was a big or small thing, he was decisive.
In sharp contrast, would be myself. I brood. I worry. I weigh pros and cons. I talk about the matter under consideration incessantly to my friends and go over all the fine points. I analyze and dissect my decisions. I ask for signs from the universe. Needless to say, decisions don't come easily to me, or quickly. If I were a politician, I would be condemned for being wishy-washy. A veritable fence sitter. What I have is a healthy dose of fear and practicality. I know that things can go wrong, and I'm not at all sure that things will go right.
I'm working on being more confident in the choices that I make. If I am quiet, I know my truth. I feel it and see it as clearly as Caribbean water. Trusting my intuition is a skill that I haven't mastered. Second guessing myself is a skill that I have mastered quite well.
I have entered the second half of my life. I have weighed the pros and the cons and have decided on happiness. I've decided on living my truth. I have no plan, I will make my choices as they appear to me. I can picture my dad sitting at his kitchen table, and smiling at me and saying, "Okay, lets do it." Without an ounce of fear or doubt. This time, at least, I would say "Okay, lets."
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
Okay, lets do it
Posted by S.D.S at 9:17 AM
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
6 comments:
I think that it is important to be decisive and resolute in our decisions and it’s great that you’re determined to be happy.
But I do not fully agree that “making plans is a waste of time”.
I think that it is important to make a full commitment to something, but once that commitment is made it cannot be enacted without planning. It is my unwavering commitment to my decisions and the resulting planning and enacting of those commitments that free me.
It’s great to be impulsive and instinctual. There is nothing wrong with fulfilling some of our cardinal desires. I want to look better, feel better, go to school, get a new job, fall in love, or make more money. How do I accomplish these things once I’ve made the decision? That’s where I must make plans to achieve my goals.
It sounds like you’re doing great and on the true path. Keep up the good work.
It's amazing how similar we are. I've always blamed it on being a Libra - being able to see both sides, and side with both sides of an issue.
I like what F40 had to say. Maybe that's because I'm a planner. But, I think we need a healthy mix of "just do it" and "let's take a moment to think about what it is we're actually gonna do".
Obsessing over planning is just as bad as underplanning. Just keep doing what feels right!
Comler,
I agree one needs to “take a moment to think about what it is we're actually gonna do" especially when there are other people involved in our lives; children, spouses, lovers, friends and family.
Well, I did take a little literary leeway and was really just describing a new outlook. Obviously, planning is necessary especially when there are other people involved. I guess that what I'm trying to throw off is fear and insecurity. A little trust that things will be okay if we are trying to be true to ourselves.
I used to think the purpose of a plan was to list all the steps you were going to do ... and then do all the steps you had listed, preferably in the same exact order.
That hasn't worked terribly well.
Nowadays I find that, for me, the purpose of a plan is to keep me in focus in the present. If I'm clear about the goal, and the next 3 or so steps to get there, that's enough. After I do those three steps, time enough to review.
Do I still want the same goal? or has it moved slightly? Now that I'm a few steps closer, is there something different in what I'm seeing as the path? What are the NEXT 3-or-so steps?
Many of my plans have never been completed, but most of the ones I've developed in the past 15 years have been replaced with 'something better' that has been achieved.
Things like the lovely house we envisioned in 1996 and moved into in 2000 (which looks nothing like the original guesstimate) ... finishing college at 53 and going to grad school ... international travel ...
I used to think the purpose of a plan was to list all the steps you were going to do ... and then do all the steps you had listed, preferably in the same exact order.
That hasn't worked terribly well.
Nowadays I find that, for me, the purpose of a plan is to keep me in focus in the present. If I'm clear about the goal, and the next 3 or so steps to get there, that's enough. After I do those three steps, time enough to review.
Do I still want the same goal? or has it moved slightly? Now that I'm a few steps closer, is there something different in what I'm seeing as the path? What are the NEXT 3-or-so steps?
Many of my plans have never been completed, but most of the ones I've developed in the past 15 years have been replaced with 'something better' that has been achieved.
Things like the lovely house we envisioned in 1996 and moved into in 2000 (which looks nothing like the original guesstimate) ... finishing college at 53 and going to grad school ... international travel ...
Post a Comment